The Pros and Cons of a Kid-Friendly Wedding: What to Consider Before Making Your Decision
/
As a couple, you're likely already knee-deep in wedding planning, with thoughts of flowers, food, and venues taking center stage. But there's one big question you'll need to answer before finalizing your guest list: should you invite kids…or not? This can be a difficult decision, with pros and cons on both sides, so here are some things to consider as you make your choice.
Pros to Kid-Friendly Weddings
Children add an element of excitement and playfulness creating a fun, festive atmosphere. They can be especially adorable in photos and videos. Additionally, inviting children of close family members, such as nieces, nephews, and cousins, can make them feel included in your celebration and show that they're important to you. It also gives your friends the choice to bring them or not. Leaving the option about whether or not to find a babysitter in their hand, especially if they have to travel, may make them feel like you are considering their needs and making it easier for them to attend the event.
Cons to Kid-Friendly Weddings
However, there are also some potential downsides to inviting kids to your wedding. Children can be noisy and disruptive, especially if they get bored or upset. And by the end of the night, when they are well past their bedtimes and outside of their routine, (speaking as a mom myself) behavior can become…well…unpredictable. They may not understand the significance of the occasion and could accidentally damage decorations or disrupt the ceremony. Additionally, some of your adult guests may not be comfortable around kids, or feel like they have to censor their behavior with kids in the room, especially if they don't have any of their own.
Other Things to Consider
Another factor to consider is the cost of inviting kids. Children typically eat less than adults, but you'll still need to provide food for them. Luckily many caterers will offer kids meals at a reduced cost. Additionally, you may need to provide extra entertainment, such as games or activities, to keep them occupied during the reception. These costs can add up quickly, especially if you're inviting a lot of kids.
On the other hand, consider how you will feel if those friends or family decline your invitation because they can’t or choose not to find someone to watch their kids so they can attend.
You could also make the decision to only invite kids from immediate family, so you're not overwhelmed by having a large number of little ones in attendance. Just be prepared to explain your decision to others whose kids were not invited.
Tips to Mitigate the Potential Downsides
If you decide to invite kids to your wedding there are few ways to mitigate any potential downsides.
Provide entertainment options like games and activities or a separate room for children to play in, so they don't get bored during the adult events.
Hire a babysitter or assign a trusted family member to take care of the kids during the wedding.
Offer kid-friendly food options that are easy to eat and less messy. Most caterers offer a kids option that is less expensive than the adult meals.
Plan a "kids table" for the reception: Having a separate table for kids can keep them entertained and give them a space to play and eat.
Have a kids' goodie bag filled with fun and age-appropriate items to keep kids occupied during the wedding.
Make sure there's enough space for them to move around: Make sure that the kids have enough room to move around and play without disturbing others.
Communicating Your Decision with Respect and Understanding
When it comes down to it, the decision whether or not to invite kids to your wedding is a personal one. Some couples may be perfectly fine with having kids in attendance, while others may prefer a more adult-oriented celebration. There's no right or wrong answer here; it all comes down to what you're comfortable with and what will make your wedding day the best it can be.
If you've decided to not invite kids to your wedding, it's important to communicate this clearly and confidently to your guests. Here are some ways to do so:
Include the information on your wedding invitation: You can include a line that reads "Adults only reception" or "Our wedding celebration is for grown-ups only."
Mention it on your wedding website: If you have a wedding website, you can add a section detailing your decision to not invite kids, and explaining that the event is for adults only.
If you have close family members with kids, it may be helpful to have a conversation with them to explain your decision and answer any questions they may have.
Be respectful and understanding when communicating your decision to guests. Let them know that you understand their situation, but that you hope they'll still be able to attend and celebrate with you.
Consider offering alternative arrangements for guests with young children who would like to attend, such as providing a babysitter or finding a nearby hotel with a babysitting service.
Remember, this is your wedding, and you should feel comfortable with the choices you make. Think about the atmosphere you want to create, the potential downsides, and the costs involved. Whether you choose to include kids or not, the most important thing is that you're surrounded by the people you love and that your celebration is filled with joy and happiness.
Eastman Events loves giving our couples a memory they will never forget, a wedding that will be so uniquely designed for them. As a planner, we can help you decide whether or not inviting kids to your wedding is right for you. Connect with us to learn more about planning your wedding in New Jersey and throughout the Northeast.